Things that no longer keep Melissa alive
Part 20: BYU Football
Oh hi. Has it been a month already? It's amazing how times flies when you're not doing anything of substance....
Lest you be offended that I haven't taken the time to blog, consider this for a moment: I have only watched one BYU football game this year. And that wasn't even the whole thing. I know, CrAzY!
Actually, most of you are probably saying the same thing with the kind of season they are having. You're thinking that I'm one of those fair weather fans. But, my history would show I am kind of the opposite, really.
For proof, I would direct you to:
- The BYU trading cards I collected in 6th grade from the D.A.R.E. program.
- There's also that time in 7th grade that my next door neighbor and I rode the UTA down to BYU to attend a football practice and get such autographs as: Eric Drage, Derwin Gray, and Ty Detmer. How many of you remember Derwin Gray?.. I rest my case. He is still my all-time favorite byu football player. If you don't know who Ty Detmer is you shouldn't even be reading this post.
- I had every season's schedule poster hanging in my room.
- I bought Ty Detmer's autobiography that he wrote right after he left BYU.
- I drew picture after picture of byu football players (including the one of Ty Detmer above).
- I made deals with God that if BYU could just win this one game against Utah that it would be ok if I never found my cat, Cougar that went missing.
- I named my black cat: Cougar.
I was reminded about my dying love this morning as I remembered one halloween when I was about 12 that BYU played Colorado State on Halloween night. I could not choose between the two events so I put on my costume over a radio headset and listened to the game while walking around the neighborhood holding a pillowcase and saying 'Trick or Treat' quite a bit louder than was necessary.
I ate, slept, breathed and vomited byu football from about the ages of 8-21. I add vomit in there because byu football games often gave me headaches which got so bad they would make me vomit.
My parent's coping mechanism for me was this: the moment a game made me cry, it was turned off.
Over the years, I developed my own coping mechanisms:
- The machete anger release. After a particularly bad game, I would take my dad's machete and head out back to vent my frustrations on the dying corn stalks.
- Watch with other (normal) people. This would encourage me to control my anger a little more.
- Don't watch at all. That's where this season comes in. Utah, anyone?
10 comments:
how have i not heard about the cat named Cougar. awesome. i havent seen a full game all year either, pretty sad.
Oh man, this post brings back some memories!! I totally remember going down to one of those practices with you guys. I thought it was the coolest thing ever lol
Your last coping mechanism made me think of Dad, "Don't play the game..." I think I was never one of those normal people you would watch with, because you always got mad when I watched with you.
Wow, how did I not know this about you?! What kind of a friend am I? I'm really suprised that you would condescend to be my friend - a non-football fan. I can't even tell you what is going on in a game. They run one way then they run the other way and stand in those lines while one of them throws the ball through their legs - right? :)
Now, if you've got a question about the Ballroom Dance team, I'm your go-to-gal.
You're freaking hilarious! So did you ever find Cougar the cat?
Yes, he was found the following spring when the snow melted....
That's gross.
Hey we just keep watching and putting ourselves through torment. It's been years since we've been able to turn on a BYU game and we're not missing it for anything. Even though I've kind've stopped cheering and I loose focus easily, I'm still watching.
As your mom, I just have to say that I was proud and interested that you are such a BYU fan. I wanted to call KSL and have you be their 10 year old girl 'color commentator'
Haha! I remember how mad you would get! I never understood it. Good thing you cut out the games so you don't get headaches-you get enough already.
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