part 38 of 365

Things that will no longer keep Melissa alive

Part 38: Farewell, the Twinkie

I know that I am among the millions paying odes to the Twinkie.  Nothing new here, move along.  But, anyone who knows me, knows the important role Twinkies have played in my life.  There are many out there publicly mourning its loss... but I suspect it's not true love for most of them.  For example, I saw a news segment where the reporter interviewed random people asking what they thought about the twinkie factories shutting down.  Every person declared it a sin against humanity.  Then, the reporter offered them a twinkie and 100% of the people said (and I quote): "nah... thanks."

So... if it's true that most of humanity doesn't actually want a twinkie when it comes down to it, then perhaps the factories really should shut down.  Let's face it, they are no good for us.  But they are oh so good for me.  If that reporter had interviewed me, I would have accepted her offer of a twinkie and then taken one more for the road.  I might go so far to say that I will never turn down the offer of a twinkie.  Even if I can't possibly eat it right then, I know I will always want it later.

So, what are twinkies good for, if no one but me actually eats them?  Here are a couple things:

Super Bowl party tray building blocks

In theory, if you just need them for building blocks, you could buy up your stock now and just use them year after year.  They'd just get more and more strong.

Twinkie Weiner Sandwich 

Or as I like to call them: Cheesy twinkie weenies.  Alas, I have yet to try one.  I don't think many people have, but they are an important part of 80's and 90's Weird Al culture. If you don't know what I'm talking about, you should question your childhood.

So, we'll miss the thought of the twinkie, but I might be the only one that actually misses eating twinkies.  The twinkie has come to symbolize so much about our society.  Think of the large twinkie-shaped hole that there would be in our culture if it never existed at all. 

part 37 of 365

Things that keep Melissa alive

Part 37: Projects

Ok, the post that I was starting to think might never come to fruition.  Just in case you thought I was all talk and no action, here is my before and after post!  Grab a comfy pillow, because this is one of those long posts that everyone loves.

You can tell from these first 2 pictures that not much of my time these last 2 months has been spent on the projects on the outside of the house.

Before:

Basically, I removed the carriages from the shutters and painted them gray. My mom chopped the plants in front. Hopefully it's the change in seasons and not the gray shutters that makes the after almost look worse.  Next spring, I'd like to do something different with the railings and screen door, and paint the front steps something other than red.

After:

Living Room
Sadly, I forgot to take before pictures of the inside of the house before I (and 12 friendly helpers) stripped all the wallpaper throughout the house in one glorious night!  But, here is a before pic from after that exploit.

Before:

There was lots of strange wood paneling with an under layer of original wallpaper on the top half that wouldn't come off.  So, I had to texture over all of that before I could paint.  The carpet really wasn't in horrible shape upstairs - it seemed very clean, even if it was old.  But, with original wood floors underneath, how could I leave it?  Also, the carpet was maroon, baby blue, baby pink, and dark blue upstairs, so I ask again: How could I leave it?

After:

My bedroom
This room had wood paneling that the previous owner had taken care to oil every year.  With that knowledge in my back pocket, I knew I needed to do some Kilz-ing if I wanted to avoid the inevitable 4-7 coats of paint it would need.

Before:

Me, high on Kilz:

After:

Kitchen
The kitchen had some amazing faux brick paneling on the walls that got stripped during my stripping party.  It also had some dark blue berber that you can imagine I had a hard time parting with.

Before:

You can see the brick paneling left lots of fun glue and potholes to deal with so I got to do some extra texturing in the kitchen.

Don't worry, I figured out just after this picture that a knife twice this big helped the texturing go slightly faster.

After:

Painting black and white checks on blue berber carpet is surprisingly time consuming.

That's all the interesting parts.  I finally put my work pants in the wash this morning and so bid farewell to the last little bits of old house dust.  I guess it's time to dust off my exercise shorts and gym pass!